When going through a divorce, it can be easy to get caught up in all of the stress and chaos that may accompany the process. From the appointments to the packing and moving and especially the child custody concerns, it may feel near impossible to take “me” time or to step back and get centered. 

When one’s challenges push them off balance, such as challenges related to divorce, it can take a toll on their mental and physical state. It is very important to be mindful and have a reference point or a place to come back to when in this situation, and while it may seem unreachable during all the chaos, it is possible. Remember that by taking care of oneself first, that person can better take care of those around them, such as their children. For those in this situation, we put together a few tips to help one be mindful during their divorce:

  • Reconnect With Friends & Family – One tip that we often share with others going through a divorce is to keep sensitive information to themselves and a select few trusted loved ones. While it is important to be cautious with sharing information with others, it is also beneficial to have trusted loved ones that one can communicate with and for moral support. This is especially true when in a heated custody battle. It is not healthy to keep all feelings to oneself, and being able to talk about feelings with someone is essential. If finding someone to trust is not an easy task, then consider meeting with a therapist/counselor as those meetings are confidential and kept private.
  • Plan for Life After Divorce – Life is constantly changing and will never be exactly the way it was in the past. This is especially true for those going through a divorce. Knowing and making peace with knowing that life will be different moving forward is an important step for one to take as they near the end of a divorce. This should be looked at in a positive light as their future can hold an unimaginable amount of happiness. When in this situation, it may be a good time for one to think about their future including future goals. This can help to put life after divorce into perspective.

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  • Remember to Stay Mindfully Present – When going through a divorce, one might be focusing on the past or may be anxious for the future. Focusing on the past is often wasted energy and can bring us down, while focusing on the future may cause unneeded anxieties. While it is important to make goals for the future, being present and living in the “now” can help one to feel centered as well as respond thoughtfully in critical or stressful situations, such as those during a divorce. Here are some tips on being mindfully present:
    • Focus on an activity you do every day and pay attention to what you are doing during that activity. If your mind wanders, bring your attention back.
    • Practice breathing techniques such as taking deep breaths. Practicing different breathing techniques can help to make us feel calmer and more present.
    • Work on forgiving the troubles of your past.
    • Give meditation a try. It can provide mental health benefits including better concentration and improved self-esteem.

A divorce is not an easy journey and can influence our physical and mental states. It does not have to be a burden on our lives, though, and with the right tips and techniques, one can get through their divorce peacefully and mindfully.

If you are approaching a divorce or in the middle of a divorce and are wondering how Wilder Mahood McKinley & Oglesby can help, contact us online or call our law firm at 412-261-4040.

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